Start Your Day with Coffee and a Prayer

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The right now Mom

I wanted to share a little about my Mom, the right now Mom. I am an only child but have two children of my own. My Mom was an only child also. She is now 77. My Mom and Dad divorced when I was 18. About 2 yrs ago or so (times flies) she was diagnosed with macular degeneration, both eyes. She has always been such an independent person. The driver; never the rider. That sort of independence that can be a little bit of a "tug of war". I learned more or less in my 40s not to argue so much. It was fruitless. She was always right. This is probably the way most of our Moms are. Must be the Mom gene. Every so often she gets so upset because of her eyes. She has been to a retinal specialist, had the injections in the worse eye, had cataract surgery in the better one but all this did not help. She really does not want to talk with anyone who has lost their vision with MD. Sometimes she expresses to me how bad it is getting. She still drives occasionally around a 2 or 3 mile radius but lately she has a friend take her places. I do not know what to do for her. I feel like she is reaching out. Remember she is very independent, shows little emotion, she is not a touchy feely type of person. Very private in certain ways. I live about 1 mile from her which is a good thing. I suppose I should just take it day by day. Do what I can. Take her places if and when she wants to go. Just be there for her. Like so many I am the one and only. We are still "parent and child". I am the child at age 56 to be 57. Good golly Ms. Molly.

Any comments appreciated but I would like to send out a request for prayer. I believe in healing and if this happened she would have such a great time going back to that independent Mom.


  1. Prayers are sent to you both. I'm thinking it just takes patience with aging parents. And I should take my own advice. Blessings.

  2. It is so difficult to face the lose of our independence, and it must be such a hard adjustment for your Mom. I would just take one day at a time and do the best you can. Sending prayers to the both of you.
    Sunny :)

  3. Thank you both Gaelyn and Sunny. I forget that we all are probably going through much the same thing or have gone through it. So many have already lost their Moms. I will just be positive no matter what.

  4. I've got quite a ways to go before I hit your mom's age but it is something I've thought about. I have always been a very independent person and the thought of losing that independence is really scary. But I am also the type that would say, if I want help I will ask. Just be there for her. My thoughts are with you both.

  5. My mother told me it didn't matter how old I was that I would always be her baby.

    Your mom sounds a lot like my Mom did when she was alive. My mom was also very vocal and sometimes she would embarrass you. One time in particular we were in the grocery store and she kept insisting that she was going to pay for my groceries.

    I told her "don't make you spank me in front of all these people". I think that's the 1st time she was actually speechless...

    Take care of her, she'll let you know what she wants.